17th July 2021

The sun. Bit hot.

It’s been a while, weather-wingers. I could give you some intricate excuse about why the weather hasn’t been done for a few weeks, but in all honesty, I couldn’t be bothered 😉

But seeing as those nice folks at the MetOffice have issued an ‘it’s a bit waaarm’ warning, and it looks like it’s going to be a bit waaarm all week, I thought I’d better come sort you lot out.
So here’s the Huddersfield Times Guide to Staying Safe when it’s Bloody Boilin’:

1. Drink. Not just beer. Don’t be an idiot and sit in the sun for hours on end pouring Stella down yer neck. HYDRATE.

2. Sun. Now I know you’re not all that clued up when it comes to science, so I’m going to put this in simple terms: the sun (that glowing circle in the sky) is a 1392700km across ball of burning plasma. It is what one might call ‘a bit toasty’ up there – a mere 5505’c on the surface. So cover-up. Put some factor 50 on. Get some shade. Nobody looks good with sunburn. Not even you, Jowitt.

3. Leisure. When it gets hot, any bit of water looks appealing. But please, please don’t go swimming in bloody stupid places. No matter how strong a swimmer you are. We don’t want to lose any readers, OK?
I reckon that’s the basics covered. Now off you go, and enjoy.

Photo by Ylanite Koppens from Pexels

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